There’s a well-known phenomena in video games development known as time-to-penis. It’s a somewhat tongue-in-cheek measurement of the time players, when given an exciting suite of new customisation tools, will take to create the first inevitable in-game dong. Ecstatica sort of implies it works the other way round too. That developers – when giddy with a new tech toy – can’t always help themselves either. But maybe I’m getting a little ahead of myself.
Ecstatica, developed by Andrew Spencer Studios and published by the long-defunct Psygnosis, originally released back in 1994. It follows a bumbling traveller who unwittingly becomes embroiled in the fate of a demon-cursed medieval village after making a rest stop in search of water. It was heavily inspired by survival horror game granddaddy Alone in the Dark (and arrived a full year before Resident Evil), but while it adopted a similar fixed-camera approach to its adventure, it had some tricks all of its own.
Most immediately notable was the decision to build its pre-rendered backdrops and characters out of ellipsoids; giving the medieval village of Tirih and its surrounding environs a softer, more organic feel compared to the angular lines afforded by the limited polygons of the time. And even today its bold, vibrant, and decidedly spherical aesthetic is quite unlike anything else.
Ecstatica isn’t, I should say, new to me. I first played it back on its original release. And it’s a game that never quite left my mind; in large part, I’ll admit, because of the relative proliferation of dick, boob, and bulge. Faced with the infinite potential ellipsoids could offer, Andrew Spencer Studios’ urge to penis was perhaps inevitable, and, lo, the moment our tights-wearing hero dismounts his horses in the opening cinematic, neither his bulbous front bauble or two–giant-eggs-in-a-hanky posterior leave anything to the imagination. And if you opt for the alternative lady hero, well, she’s got ample going on there too.
And so it continues: prancing fawns with mega-breasts, muscle gimps with proud chipolatas. Ecstatica really is a singular sort of horror game. But while the cheerfully perky genitalia is undoubtedly what my teenage brain chose to squirrel away in the memory vaults, I also had distant recollections of a game that was intriguing for other, more interesting reasons. So when SNEG – a publisher founded by GOG veterans and focused on reviving lost classics – announced it was re-releasing Ecstatica and its sequel in time for Halloween, I knew I had to go back.
And you know what? After spending a few happy hours revisiting Ecstatica these past few nights, I kind of feel bad I’d mostly condensed it down to its naughty bits (for starters, the pickles, plums, and melons aren’t quite as frequent as I remember them). This really is a fascinating game, with a wonderfully, uniquely odd mood – playing something like a bawdy fairytale as it blends daft slapstick silliness with an effectively sinister undertone. This is a game where our hero will stop for an unprovoked pee in a bush or, after being turned into a frog, must seek a kiss from the busty woman who lives down the road. The surprisingly great voice acting, while scant, is pure British whimsy, but throughout the village: demonic destruction, gory evisceration, and crucifixion. And Ecstatica walks a tonal tightrope that somehow works.
It still looks fantastic in its own strange way too; its broad-daylight horrors are vibrantly hued, everything is exuberantly animated, and there’s so much characterful incidental detail. As you roam from one jauntily angled screen to the next, searching for objects you’ll need to progress – a bible dropped by a hanged priest you can read aloud at the monastery gates, or a flying broomstick you’ll need to navigate a boobytrapped dungeon – you’ll encounter ale-swigging bears, perpetually annoyed imps with tiny pitchforks, and peeved minotaurs. You’ll trip on rocks and inelegantly face-plant; you’ll smack your bonce on low ceilings; you’ll excitedly put on a suit of armour only to discover it slows you to a comically useless crawl. And you can even kick a priest off the belltower if you’re feeling particularly mean.
It’s not your usual sort of survival horror, then, but it’s got one hell of a trick up its sleeve: recurring enemies that’ll readily give chase, notably including an unkillable werewolf that’s essentially a precursor to the stalkers – think Resident Evil’s Mr. X – beloved by modern-day horror games. You’ll catch him peeking around corners as the camera switches to a new angle, he’ll launch a surprise attack from the rooftops, or suddenly give chase if you disturb his murdering. And when that happens, he’s relentless – the only way you’ll lose him is to inflict enough damage he’ll give momentary pause, or hide in a cupboard until he moves on. There’s even a little stealth. It’s rudimentary stuff by today’s standards, not helped by the unwieldy combat and tank controls, but it still manages to muster a whiff of tension. And it’s remarkable to rediscover something so pioneering in a title I’d mentally reduced to ‘the willy game’ – particularly when horror’s better-known 3D stalker series, like Clock Tower, were yet to come.
Granted, Ecstatica has enough old-school jank that it’s not an easy recommendation for modern players; from its wayward combat to its untelegraphed (though pretty amusing) sudden deaths. Or the inventory system, which demands you drop anything your two hands can’t hold right there on the floor – so you better remember where you left it. And you’re screwed if you accidentally place something in tall grass or just outside the fixed camera frame. SNEG’s remaster, though, is decent, and an enjoyable way to experience this cult-classic curio.
And ‘curio’ is perhaps the best word to describe Ecstatica, with its pioneering survival horror spirit, its ellipsoids, and its unashamed love of slapstick, boobs, and dong. It’s been an unexpected pleasure revisiting it some 30 years later, and I’m excited I’ll soon have my very first brush with Ecstatica 2. All I know about the 1997 sequel is its hero isn’t blessed with a prominent bauble from the off, so its time-to-penis is already looking like a longer one.
